I Love Stock Photography, Pt 2

I have mentioned before that my job requires me to carouse the dirty streets of Shutterstock quite frequently, with hilarious results.

One of my last jobs required me to find a picture of a "female doctor". This should not be so difficult. My exact search query was "female doctor".

This photo is titled "Young angry doctor with axe". I had to include the title so you would be aware that the submitter wanted us to know that this woman is, specifically, a doctor. My doctor is usually a 22-year old with a pink nightie and flip flops, so this makes perfect sense. My doctor is also Kevorkian's sexy granddaughter.



Gotta love these two bananas!


This one is simply titled "Bad Diagnosis". The doctor isn't pictured, but I guess we're to assume that a female doctor is breaking the bad news. Just what is the bad news? Acne? Underbite? Lupus? Grey shirt? The possibilities are endless!

I Love Stock Photos!

I work for a company that makes computer training courses. Sometimes, my job is to sometimes create/find graphics for the latest "General Lightbulb Co.: Sexual Harassment Policy" course or whatever the new compulsory businessland training du jour is.

Usually the client will request something like "please put a picture of an old woman here" or something equally vague. It's then when I get to turn to my ultimate bag of tricks - STOCK PHOTOGRAPHY!

If you are unaware, stock photography is an industry dedicated to creating millions of photographs that are just ambiguous enough in subject matter to be used and purchased for pretty much anything.

That last query was real, and here's some of the gems I dredged up:
I think this photo was put out there to quell all those requests for erotic old lady stock photos. Success?I believe this is from their "Florida Retirees on the Edge of Death" series.This picture reflects the tragedy of senior dementia.
My favorite senior model returns for a "gonna fuck you up" series.